Today I am missing the fullness and busyness of life as it was.
I am missing once again being surrounded by people I love and who love me in return.
I know that these things take time and it is definitely one of the hardest parts of transition for me.
There are so many things that I love about the place that we are in though and for a moment I want to focus on those:
1. We get time with our families on a consistent basis. We are a part of the everyday moments and special moments and that definitely makes my heart happy.
2. We are getting to build new relationships and build a church from the bottom up and that is very exciting to us. We love that we know that we will get to be here for the long haul and watch our kiddos grow up and become workers and then graduate and go off to college and get married and have children, etc.
3. We are growing and evolving so much and drawing even closer to God than ever before.
4. Our ministry and leadership is evolving and it is absolutely amazing to see.
5. My husband is absolutely blossoming and it is so very amazing to see.
6. We are experiencing God's faithfulness in ways that we would not have otherwise.
I know that we are just exactly where we are supposed to be and that we absolutely followed God here and that He is most certainly in this transition. It has been an easy transition in so many ways.
But today I am missing the fullness and busyness of life as it was. Today I am missing the MO peeps that I came to love with a love that I did not even know I had. Today I miss my kids - ALL of their sweet faces and sweet hearts. Today I miss the family units. Today I miss the parents. Today I miss the halls, the skyroom, the fungeon, my office, the grounds that made up Praise Assembly. Today I miss my friends and those who loved me and accepted me and knew me. Today I miss my little yellow house. Today I miss my neighbors. Today I miss Old Navy and the sweet friends that we made there. Today I miss CBC days and the friends and memories made there. Today I miss the streets of Springfield and the familiar places. Today I miss Culvers custard, Old Chicago Pizza, Nearly Famous Deli, the park where I had great time with my girls and great walks, the softball park, our two apartments, Battlefield Mall, Qudoba, the creek, Branson, our small couples group and all it's craziness, Silver Dollar City, 65 and I44, Glenstone, ABC Books, Kearney, Kansas, I miss so much. I miss the faces in the hall and the hugs.
I feel so behind here, I feel so out of touch with love, hugs, ministry, mentoring, people. I know it takes time and it's not something to be rushed. I don't really want to live my life waiting for what's to come instead of enjoying the moment but it is hard.
So today I am excited for kids camp tomorrow and praying with all of my heart that relationships will be cultivated and deepen. I am praying for a refreshing time for our kids as well as for me. I am praying for the beginning of something truly truly great. I am praying for a time to regroup and come back stronger than ever, ready to go go go.
Today I am excited for the future because I know that God has an amazing one planned for us. Today I am excited for the opportunities that I know nothing about yet. Today I am excited for the busyness and fullness that is to come. Today I will revel in the calm and quite and I will fill my heart and soul with the Savior that never lets me down and I will build my faith and expectation. Today I will love the place that I am in and appreciate it for exactly what it is.
Today is:
1. A calm Saturday morning. Hubby is still in bed snoring, Tater is sitting next to me in his favorite spot in front of the window napping.
2. We are in a rental house that meets our needs in a small community that we have fallen in love with that is near the church and hubby's job.
3. The laundry is done and there are a few dinner dishes left over to wash.
4. I am mostly organize and ready to pack for kids camp. My first Alabama kids camp in 4 years
5. We are meeting friends from MO today and I get to see two of the girls I mentored and fell head over heels in love with. It makes me sad because I'll only get to see them for a few hours and I know I'll have to say goodbye again, but I am so ready to see them and hug them.
6. Our needs are met and then some.
7. We have visited ALL of our families recently.
8. We have friends coming over next weekend for hubby's birthday.
9. We are in the process of praying for and planning a family.
10. God is so incredibly faithful. Faithful beyond what we could imagine.
So there are times that life slows you down and you find yourself looking around at seemingly less that what you had before, but truthfully our lives are just as full and becoming fuller as we build new relationships and as we dream for future things to come. And these slower moments are meant for rest and rebuilding and for drawing closer to the God who is beyond what one could ask or dream.
I am okay. I am content. I have joy. And I am blessed beyond anything that I could imagine.
Lord, have Your way in my heart and life. I know that one day soon the busyness will return and I will long for these quieter times. So help me to be content and full of joy in the present and to not live for the future only. Bless our time at kids camp and let them be all that you desire for them to be. Bless these slower days and help me to make the best of each one. In Jesus name. Amen.
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