Monday, August 01, 2005

Selfish, Selfish, Selfish

Intriguing title huh...well God has been speaking to me about my selfishness...I have today committed to the journey to SELFLESSNESS...not it wont be easy...but I want it so badly...there are so many negative things that stem from selfishness...things that affect those around me greatly...I am tired of being selfish...I am tired of hurting those around me by being selfish...it causes me to be ugly, ungrateful, inconsiderate, annoying, bossy, to name a few...all in all it is just an ugly thing to be...Bro David spoke on Gratitude yesterday...and I knew immediately I had been ungrateful to God and several others in my life...I knew immediately it stems from my selfishness...I have actually known for a while that I am selfish and wanted to work on it...but not quite the way I know and want to work on it now...I know that God can change this in me...I know that He has changed so much of the ugly in me...and I am looking forward to arriving at my goal...but I have no thoughts of it being easy...but I know it will be worth it...especially to all those around me...so if you read this please be praying for me...you know God has been good to me...selfishness aside...He has provided me with family, friends, church, a home, a car, a job...and even when I mess up royally He takes care of me anyway...even when I am unfaithful and not obediant...there He is loving me, ever faithful to me...you know we just could not ask for a better Father than that...I only seek to be more like Him...and I aim to seek Him with all that is in me and get closer to arriving there...closer to Him...pray for me please...well...on a different note...as the days have gone by I have come more and more to realize how wonderful my vacation truly was...mind you it was not what I thought it would be...and that is mostly my fault...but it was wonderful nevertheless...I always set things up in my mind as to what I want them to be...and when they do not turn out exactly like I planned in my head I get disappointed...but that is not to say they arent still wonderful...I am just now realizing this...could be the Meloncholy in me...who knows...anyway I am so thankful for such an amazing and wonderful vacation...there are things I wish I could go back and change(mainly my attitude through out the trip and my actions)...but I can learn from that and move on...I have already been forgiven for the most part...but I just want to thank God for the vacation, Dad, and Neesie...without them there would have been no vacation like that...so Thank you guys...I truly had a wonderful time...forgive my shortcomings, I know they were loud and many...I just ask you to forgive me...I have so many more pictures maybe I can post some more later...hope you enjoyed what did get posted...well today has been a glorious day at work...everyone is in a meeting at the retail store so it has been super quiet here and I have loved it...I have gotten almost all my work done...and tonight I am going to the Women's Meeting and I am super excited...Miss Lynn is going to show us how to hand tint photographs...I have always wanted to do photography...I love taking pictures...so my mind has drifted toward taking a class or two...we shall see though...well I had better run get some lunch and get back and check on the guys in the warehouse...until next time...orivrar...heha...Seeking Him!

3 comments:

The1AndOnlyDANIELLE! said...

I missed ya sunday....I havent seen you in like FOREVER! haha!

The1AndOnlyDANIELLE! said...

oh..and I commented on a lot of your pictures!

Ashlee said...

tabbie,your page simply caught my attention..Just dropping by to make a short statement bout your blog..uhm i think that your blogs are cute and awesome.. Hope to hear from you..